"It’s easy for me to get into a fight with [kids] for some reason. They can just push my buttons. … [Friend and frequent collaborator] Paul Dinello walked in on me once, and I was having an argument on the phone with somebody, which I never do. He goes, ‘Who are you talking to?’ and I go, ‘This f–king three-year-old!’ Someone had sent me some kind of tools in the mail, and I tracked the number down and was asking him, ‘Why’d you send these to me?’ I said, ‘Is your mother home?’ and he kept saying, ‘No!’ and I was like, ‘Oh, right, you’re three and your mom’s not there?’ … It turned out Paul had ordered the tools off eBay from the three-year-old’s parents."
Seriously, kids are totally dumb. I just had an incident 2 weeks ago with an 7-year-old over a seesaw. I told her I couldn't play on the backyard set cause I'm too big, however she insisted, and just to prove her wrong I sat on it. This led to a screw busting out and said backyard seesaw is hanging on by a thin metal strand. The next person who sits on that thing is a goner. Hopefully, it's that 7-year-old.